Building a SAFeR System: Preventing Tragedy in Child Custody Outcomes
By Kaitlyn Baker, Intern, National Legal Center on Children and Domestic Violence When the justice system fails to protect its…
Building a SAFeR System: Preventing Tragedy in Child Custody Outcomes
By Kaitlyn Baker, Intern, National Legal Center on Children and Domestic Violence
When the justice system fails to protect its most vulnerable, the effects are tragic. On June 2, 2025, the bodies of three young sisters-Paityn, Evelyn, and Olivia Decker-were discovered, murdered, in a Washington campground. Paityn was 9 years old, Evelyn 8, and Olivia only 5. They were killed on a scheduled, court-ordered custody visit with their father. Their deaths are part of a troubling pattern in which signs of danger are either not recognized or ignored, with fatal consequences.
Judges order an estimated 58,000 children a year into unsupervised contact with dangerous and abusive parents.[1] Each of those 58,000 children is a life at risk. In 2022 alone, nearly 2,000 died from abuse or neglect.[2] Many of these deaths were a result of court failures.[3]
Many children are also abused or neglected. In 2022, at least half of a million children were mistreated.[4] Abused children can carry their trauma with them for life. Children who have experienced abuse suffer more chronic diseases, have worse mental health, and die earlier than their non-abused peers.[5] Domestic violence against children is a chronic problem that carries long-term consequences, and we need legal and community-based solutions.
It is critically important that legal actors and communities recognize the markers of abuse before it is too late. Too often, protective parents will raise concerns of child abuse and be ignored or punished by courts. According to one study, mothers who allege abuse are believed in only 41% of cases.[6] Indeed, raising abuse allegations may even increase their risk of losing custody. Fathers who were accused of abuse, and counter-accused the mother of parental alienation, won custody 72% of the time.[7] The system’s failure to credit and address claims of child abuse exposes children to grave and preventable risk.
Courts also need research-based protocols for screening and responding to allegations of violence in the home. BWJP’s National Legal Center on Children and Domestic Violence developed the SAFeR approach to meet this need.[8] The SAFeR program offers customized training and state-specific worksheets to advocates, community members, and family court professionals, including specific resources on screening for, assessing, focusing on effects, and responding to abuse. The worksheets list the different forms of abuse and those risk factors that warn of a potential tragedy. The SAFeR approach also assists practitioners in creating tailored responses that help each family move forward as safely as possible. In other words, the SAFeR program helps practitioners identify “red flags” of domestic violence, assess the effects of violence in the context of relationships, and respond appropriately. SAFeR helps prevent any child from being unwittingly trapped in a home with a dangerous parent.
Every red flag ignored is a risk accepted. We owe it to the children at risk to spot the warning signs and act. It may save lives.
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For more information on the SAFeR program, or to request a training, visit the webpage of the National Legal Center on Children and Domestic Violence.
If you are experiencing domestic violence and do not know where to turn for assistance or advice, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at (800) 799-7233.
[1] Cynwyd, B. (2023, August 18). How Many Children are Court-Ordered into Unsupervised Contact with an Abusive Parent After Divorce? The Leadership Council on Child Abuse & Interpersonal Violence. https://leadershipcouncil.org/how-many-children-are-court-ordered/.
[2] Child Maltreatment 2022. (2024, January 29). The Children’s Bureau: An Office of the Administration for Children & Families. https://acf.gov/cb/report/child-maltreatment-2022.
[3] Child Safety First: Preventing Child Homicides During Divorce, Separation, and Child Custody Disputes. (2023, July 17). Center for Judicial Excellence. https://centerforjudicialexcellence.org/2023/07/17/cje-releases-child-safety-report/.
[4] See fn 2.
[5] Monnat, S. M., and Chandler, R. F. (2015, November 28). Long Term Physical Health Consequences of Adverse Childhood Experiences. The Sociological Quarterly, 56(4), 723-752. https://doi.org/10.1111/tsq.12107.
[6] Meier, J. S. (2020). U.S. Child Custody Outcomes in Cases involving Parental Alienation and Abuse Allegations: What do the Data Show? Journal of Social Welfare and Family Law, 42(1), 92–105 at 96. https://doi.org/10.1080/09649069.2020.1701941
[7] Meier, J. S., & Dickson, S. (2017). Mapping Gender: Shedding Light on Family Courts’ Treatment of Cases Involving Abuse and Alienation. Law & Inequality: A Journal of Theory and Practice, 35(2), 311-334 at 328. https://scholarship.law.umn.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1576&context=lawineq.
[8] Practice Guides for Family Court Decision-Making in Domestic Abuse-Related Child Custody Matters (Forms and Instructions) – BWJP. (2018). BWJP. https://bwjp.org/assets/compiled-practice-guides-may-2018.pdf.
